Lotor kept stealing secretive glances over at Allura's pretty profile, trying to determine what
she might be thinking. He didn't want to drop her off on Arus just yet, he wanted to spend
more time with her. But he'd been doing so well up until this point by being as gentlemanly as
he was capable of, and if it would hurt his chances with Allura to rush her he didn't want
to do that either.
For years Lotor tried to convince himself that if he just took Allura and got it over with, he'd
be able to get her out of his system once and for all, and finally be free of his consuming
obsession with the Princess of Arus. But now, he realized he'd been dead wrong.
Lotor didn't want to be "free" of her, he still wanted to seduce her, but not just once. What he
really wanted was to have Allura stay willingly by his side every day and in his arms every
night. He wanted more than anything to marry her, not to prove he could break the proud
Princess's spirit but because he loved her. The thought of this night coming to an end, and
them becoming enemies again, bored a painful hole in his heart. But what else could he do?
If he reached for her now, tried to keep her with him, she'd just run away again, hating
him, fearing him.
Wouldn't she?
Allura reached up and covered the pin on her chest with her hand. She released the catch
and removed it, hiding it in her palm. She looked over at Lotor, who was still facing straight
ahead. He hadn't seen her. Allura opened her hand and peeked down at the scrap of silver
resting there. It looked so fragile, insubstantial, like a piece of tin foil. In that moment she
made up her mind.
-------------
The Lions were following Lotor's cruiser at a respectable distance when Lance suddenly
said, "Keith, we've got a problem."
"What's wrong?"
"I just lost the signal from Ally's mic. It didn't sound like she was in any danger, the thing just
went dead. With devices that small, it's not uncommon."
Keith thought for a moment. "Let's stay on their tail. At least we know Lotor won't harm her.
When they land we'll get the Princess out of his evil clutches," Keith announced in his over-the-top,
valiant do-gooder way.
"Uh, yeah, whatever," Lance muttered, no longer paying attention. He was back to admiring his
handsome self in the lighted vanity mirror he'd just installed in the Red Lion.
-------------
"Well, here we are," Lotor with a regretful sigh as planet Arus came into view.
"Could we take a detour first?" Allura asked softly, suddenly nervous again. She could hardly
believe what she was doing right now, and how much farther she was about to go. Stealthily she
drilled the point of one of her stiletto heels into the floor, crushing what was left of the microphone
underneath until it couldn't possibly be transmitting anymore. "I need to talk to you."
Lotor took her up on it instantly. "Where to?"
She directed him to a landing site in the forest, close to the castle but obscured from view within
a dense thicket of trees. She didn't want anyone to know she was back yet. Lotor cut the engines,
and turned to her with a look of inquiry. "Something on your mind, Allura?"
"Uh.. yes. I just wanted to say... thanks. I had a nice time tonight." She squirmed restlessly
in her seat, unsure of herself, of what to do or say.
He smiled, not his usual smirk. "You're welcome. So did I."
"I wasn't expecting to," she told him quickly. "I mean, most of the other princes I've gone out with
were so... boring. They were always so cold and formal, more like they were interviewing for a job
than seeking my hand in marriage. I hate that. None of them wanted to know me for who I am,
they only wanted me for my title and my important position. And then there were the ones who
only wanted... you know, sex." She flushed, a little self-conscious about divulging such an
embarrassing thing to him, of all people.
"Those morons don't deserve you," Lotor said loyally. "But unfortunately, a royal marriage is only
supposed to do two things. Increase political status, and make heirs. That's it. Sucks, doesn't it?
The lowliest peasant has the freedom to choose anyone they want, but people like us can't. That's
why so many married royals have lovers on the side, both the men and the women. Most royal
marriages aren't worth shit. Pairs of strangers who live in the same house but never speak to
each other, sleeping in seperate beds for their entire seperate lives, except for whatever minutes
it may take to do the duty of conceiving a child."
"But my parents loved each other," Allura pointed out. "Seeing how happy they were, being raised
in a warm family- I could never settle for a loveless marriage."
"I wouldn't either." Lotor admitted. "That's why I'll never marry."
"You know, you're the one always trying to make me marry you," Allura reminded him, trying
to prove him wrong.
"Because you are the only one I'll ever love," he answered with gentle candor, snatching the wind
from her self-righteous sails. "I love you, Allura, and I always will. But if I can't have you, I don't
ever want to marry. Like you, I'd rather have nothing than second best."
Allura was shocked speechless. This was the first time she'd ever heard him use that special word,
"love". He'd tried so many times to force her into marriage, and made it crystal clear he wanted her
sexually, but not once had he ever said he loved her. Allura gave up trying to deny the shivery thrill
that jolted her when he'd said that. But her brain still demanded more proof, she needed to be sure
he wasn't just saying that to get her in bed. If that was his plan, it was accomplishing what all his
other schemes hadn't. It was working.
He seemed to read her mind. "You don't believe me, do you?"
She hesitated. "I don't know."
"Okay, I'll prove it. Just tell me you don't love me, and I'll leave you alone. I'll never bother you
again." He looked at her with such sincerity, the love was right there in his eyes. Was that new,
or had it always been there? Had she just turned away from it, refused to see what was there
all along? How could she look into those eyes, and lie? Impossible.
"I.." Oh, what the hell, she thought. Might as well go for it. Can't win without a gamble, can
you? "I... can't say that."
Lotor forgot to breathe for several seconds. Once he recovered his wits, he asked, "Why not?"
"Because," she told him shakily, her heart racing like a greyhound and her blood roaring in her
ears, "I love you too." Suddenly shy, she waited silently for what felt like forever for some
response from him.
Chapter Six